on being still and moving on

i’m barely four months into this year, and already, i can tell it’s going to be epic.  not easy or smooth or comfortable, but important — formidable, perhaps even grand.

and i’m ready.

“you do realize that you’re still holding on with both hands, right?,” he said from that overstuffed beige arm chair with dark wooden legs.

puzzled, i let that sink in for a minute before saying, “i do now.”

and it was then, in that moment, i realized that in order to really move on and let go, i have to be still.

yes, still.

so, so still.

i have to stop running — to or from — and just be *here*. and listen.

hush

it’s in the stillness of *here* that i’ve found my answers, my compass, my light — things i’ve been seeking from outside myself, only to realize that they’re already here, inside.  and they’ve been here all along.  they come to me in a hushed whisper, in the breath between words; they come from a place of absolute truth and authenticity carrying with them things like hope and peace and grace.

being still is work in progress, especially for me.  my mind is always going and  it can be difficult to quell the expectations and entitlements and fears to find that quiet space inside.  at best, it’s a struggle, and sometimes i find myself feeling frustrated and defeated and empty.  and that’s precisely when i tell myself to stop, and be still, in this moment.

yes.

i hear you.

i’m ready.

 


2 Comments

Heather-beautiful blog! Cant wait to meet up in June!

Posted by cyndi s on 31 March 2012 @ 6pm

Thank you, Cyndi! I’m looking forward to June, as well — can’t come soon enough!

Posted by heatherdyan on 31 March 2012 @ 9pm

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